The secret diary of a bride to be

The secret diary of a bride to be

This month our bride pops the question to her bridesmaids…

Deciding to get married was (relatively) easy. Finding a venue, dress and jars big enough to fit fairy lights inside, not so much. But, probably the toughest task so far has been selecting the bridal party. Something that should be pretty straightforward (asking people you like to be by your side on the most important day of your life), has turned into some sort of stressful and complicated task.

Firstly, you have to decide how many people you want to be in your bridal party. For my fiancé, this was easy because he has one group of friends, who have all been groomsmen for each other. For me, the decision wasn’t quite so straightforward. My first dilemma was deciding how important it is to return the bridesmaid favour – having been one three times now and heading for a fourth stint shortly, I wondered whether I should just make life easier by asking these friends to be mine too.

After deciding that, due to the fact I haven’t seen one of these previous brides in two years I wouldn’t just return the favour, I was then faced with the decision over who to ask. After initially deciding I would only have three, then having sleepless nights over how to tell another friend she was off the list, I decided maybe four was the magic number – a combination of friends from various stages of my life and my fiancé’s sister.

Nowadays, you’re expected to dream up inventive ways to ask your men or maids to be a part of your special day. There are whole Pinterest boards dedicated to this stuff; it’s no longer acceptable to mention the proposition over a casual drink in the local, you have to shower your friends with gifts and personal touches. And that’s all before forking out a fortune on outfits for them to wear. I spent weeks trying to source original gifts and hand crafted cards (regularly gluing my fingers together in the process), before finally being ready to pop the question.

By this point, I had been engaged for four months and it hardly seemed worth the big reveal, but I met each bridesmaid individually to deliver their gift and good news. Well, I met three of them. The fourth lives further away and her present was rather weighty, so I decided to post it, before one of the other bridesmaids gave the game away on social media. Off I trundled to the post office, parcel in hand, glad that this would finally be a weight off my mind, and arms. Sadly, it was also a weight off my purse – somehow I agreed to send the parcel to Essex for the same price as flying to Rome for a weekend. Thankfully the bridesmaid in question agreed to my proposition and all four were finally on board.

“How are you going to ask the boys to be your groomsmen?” I asked my fiancé, ready to get the glue gun back out and start crafting a few more cards. “I’ll just ask them when I see them,” came the somewhat bemused reply. Then, in fairness he doesn’t use Pinterest, so maybe he just doesn’t know about all the sentimental gift and bank balance crippling postal options available…

Next month find out how our bride is getting on with planning…